Prof. Pizpoploop
Ridgeling,
Male,
Alchemy professor at New Ork University
Sgt. Groptoph,
Ogre
,
Male,
Sergeant in the Orc Imperial Army
#15) Ask Da Orcs
Dear Ask Da Orcs:
I'm a human female who will be going to a wedding soon and I want to know how long I must stay at the reception? I hate weddings - especially receptions. It's just not my thing. How long should I stay before it is ok to leave? I'm not part of the wedding party.
Also, do Orcs have weddings? If so, how do they differ from human weddings?
- Yamama
2) Response from Sgt. Groptoph
Stay til da beer runns owt. Den brake tings!!!
AAAAAAaaaaarrrrrrrggggggGGGHHHH!!!!!!!!
4) Response from Prof. Pizpoploop
Dear "Yamama":
Ridgelings, such as myself, have "couplings" that are somewhat analogous to being married. Traditionally it is made official in a short ceremony that ends with the couple (and a select group of friends) feasting on the body of a dead relative (who died of natural causes) that has been preserved and prepared for the occasion. A feast of insects, grubs and roots is usually provided afterwards to an extended group of well-wishers.
Sincerely,
Prof. Pizpoploop
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Gix,
Gremlin,
Hermaphrodite,
Freelance Artist
1) Response from Gix:
Gix (the three word Gremlin) says...
About... An... Hour...
Ms. Shaftfut
Hobgoblin
, Female,
Cartographer
6) Response from Ms. Shaftfut
Dear Yamama:
Firstly... You are obviously only going because you feel obligated to go - For someone in that position - I recommend you skip the reception altogether and only attend the ceremony. After the ceremony, be sure to congratulate the bride and groom so that you get "credit" for showing up.
Secondly... If you feel obligated to go to the reception too. (For example, if you want to drop off your gift.) Then I recommend you
attempt
to have a good time. There will likely be free food, beer and music. A few cute guys might be there too. If you are dating someone, then invite him along. If, after a short while, you simply can't enjoy yourself - you can always discretely leave.
- Shaftfut
Ms. Gunkatuk,
Half-Orc
(half-human),
Female,
R.N. at Goblinville Medical Center
5) Response from Gunkatuk
Dear "Yamama" -
It all depends on how well you know the bride and groom. If they are not good friends or close relatives - you can feel free to leave about a half hour after eating or right after the cake is cut - which ever comes first.
- Gunkatuk
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You?
3) Response from Mr. Gob'Wuxbux
Dear Yamama -
You don't like receptions?!? Food, music, cake, beer... What's not to like?
Well if you MUST leave - be sure to hug the bride and groom, thank them for inviting your sorry ass, then discretely leave.
- Gob'Wuxbux
Mr. Gob'Wuxbux,
Goblin
,
Male,
Online Journalist for
New Orker Magazine
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