Sgt. Groptoph,
Ogre
,
Male,
Sergeant in the Orc Imperial Army
Ms. Shaftfut
Hobgoblin
, Female,
Cartographer
2) Response from Sgt. Groptoph
If'n she hits ya, den ya hits her bak hard! AAAAaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrgggggggGGGGHHH!!!!!
If'n tat dont wurk den be friends wit somwon else!
6) Response from Prof. Pizpoploop
Dear "Sad":
It is time for you to make some new friends.
Sincerely,
Prof. Pizpoploop
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Mr. Gob'Wuxbux,
Goblin
,
Male,
Online Journalist for
New Orker Magazine
1) Response from Ms. Shaftfut
Dear Sad:
Firstly... You have the worst case of friendship-Stockholm-syndrome that I have ever seen! A friend should not intentionally try to hurt you in the way that Hannah does. And a friend certainly doesn't laugh at you when you are bleeding from a nearly fatal head wound! Stop spending time with that fucking bitch!
Secondly... You wrote
"My mom of course doesn't help and my friends don't get it."
What the hell is your mom supposed to do? It is up to you to pick your friends. And if your other friends can't understand why you don't want to be around Hannah - then perhaps you should stop hanging around with them too.
- Shaftfut
Ms. Gunkatuk,
Half-Orc
(half-human),
Female,
R.N. at Goblinville Medical Center
3) Response from Gunkatuk
Dear "Sad" -
Your friends are bitches - find different ones.
You deserve to be treated better then that.
- Gunkatuk
4) Response from Mr. Gob'Wuxbux
Dear Sad -
Normally I piss all over everyone and everything like a junk-yard dog on diuretics, but because you are a 11 year-old girl who is having a hard time - I'm going to be uncharacteristically sensitive and straightforward in my response to your request for help...
...Don't waste your time with mean people who treat you like shit! Hannah is a fucking asshole! Stay away from her!
- Gob'Wuxbux
Gix,
Gremlin,
Hermaphrodite,
Freelance Artist
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Prof. Pizpoploop
Ridgeling,
Male,
Alchemy professor at New Ork University
You?
#9) Ask Da Orcs
Dear A.D.O,
I'm a 11 year old girl and I'm almost in 6th grade. My friend, or maybe my not-so-friend, Hannah, is being a bitch to me. Every day she calls me a retard, hits me and pulls my hair. She also laughs whenever someone gets hurt. The other day, I was riding my friend's horse and I fell off. My head was bleeding and I thought I was going to die. My friends took me to Hannah's house and when her stepdad asked what happened - Hannah said "She hurt herself! Hahahaha!" Later I heard Hannah whisper to my other friend, "Let's do that again, but this time she won't ride the horse, she'll just fall off. She's so stupid! How can you fall off a horse?! Hahahaha!"
Soooo yeh.... My mom of course doesn't help at all and my friends don't get it.
PLEASE help,
- Sad
5)
Response from Gix:
Gix (the three word Gremlin) says...
Make... New.... Friends...
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